Thursday, January 31, 2008

To Sir With Love


Dear Bob,

I am an avid viewer of your Sunday morning news program, Face the Nation. In fact, it is the only Sunday morning political show I enjoy watching. Your measured, unbiased reporting and interviewing skills are unrivaled amongst your colleagues.

My boyfriend is a politics junkie and, if he had his way, he would watch every news program and channel that existed including (but not limited to) CNN, MSNBC, FOX News, C-SPAN, Jim Lehrer, Chris Matthews and every program that has Tim Russert. I prefer Supernanny and Project Runway.

In choosing to retire from your program you are seriously jeopardizing the delicate balance of peace and televising equality in our home. My boyfriend could always count on me agreeing to watch your program without any groaning, eye-rolling or needing to promise me long back scratches which is what he is met with when he wants to watch pretty much anything else that isn't Ancient Discoveries, Jon & Kate plus Eight or SYTYCD/ANTM Cycle a billion.

In short, I find your choice selfish and thoughtless.

If you want to have unrest brought upon households across this fine country then please go ahead and retire. Play golf in the Bahamas and write your books. Play music with your friends and enjoy your children and grandchildren. If you need to be self-centered in that way then, by all means, go ahead. But if you care about this country the way you claim to then you should not retire but rather add a daily program to your schedule as well as your Sunday program. My relationship and therefor the world will fare better.

Thank you.

Sincerely,
A Concerned Viewer

PS -- Please don't take this the wrong way. You are a very nice man which is why I like your program so much. Do the right thing.

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